EP. 44 Filling the Blank Space After Loss: Jason Rosenthal on My Wife Said You May Want to Marry Me
Today I am speaking to Jason Rosenthal, whose memoir, My Wife Said You May Want to Marry Me , is a story of true love, true loss, and how to truly live again after that loss. It all began with an extraordinary essay written by Jason’s wife, Amy Krouse Rosenthal, a prolific author, public speaker, and filmmaker. In 2017, Amy wrote a piece for the New York Times Modern Love column titled You May Want to Marry My Husband . It was a love letter to Jason, written in the form of a personal ad. Amy was living with incurable ovarian cancer, and she wanted Jason, her husband and soulmate of 26 years, to experience joy and love again after she was gone. In the essay, she celebrates him in the most intimate and generous way. We learn that Jason is a great dad, a good cook, a lover of live music, handsome, stylish, and full of life. She writes about falling in love with him the day they met, and ends with the hope that the right person might read it. Amy died just ten days after the article was published. The piece went viral, read by millions, and it changed Jason’s life overnight. A private person, a lawyer, and a devoted family man, he suddenly found himself in the public spotlight. A year later, Jason wrote his own response in the New York Times Modern Love column. His essay, My Wife Said You May Want to Marry Me , shares the same title as his memoir, and begins with the line, “I am that guy.” In this conversation, we explore what came next. Jason reflects on grief not as something linear, but as something that moves in waves over time. He shares what it meant to be given permission by Amy to move forward, and how that has shaped his life in the years since her death. We talk about Amy’s creativity and love of language, including their “marriage goals” list, and how her spirit continues to influence the way he sees the world. We also explore how Jason has chosen to fill the blank space after loss. He stepped away from his career in law, retrained as a social worker, and now works as a grief therapist. He has commissioned public art in Amy’s honour and co-founded a foundation supporting ovarian cancer research and book giving. This episode is both deeply moving and quietly practical. Jason shares thoughtful advice on how to support someone who is grieving, why honest end of life conversations matter, and how it’s possible to find moments of joy again, even in the hardest circumstances. It’s a conversation about love that doesn’t end, and what it means to keep living alongside grief. This Substack is reader-supported. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. Timestamps 00:00 Welcome to the Podcast00:28 Amy’s Viral Love Letter02:17 Nine Years of Grief03:33 Permission to Move On04:58 Why Jason Wrote the Memoir06:54 Talking About Death Honestly07:54 Honeymoon Marriage Goals List10:22 Wordplay and Creative Spark11:32 “More Time Here” Message15:22 Filling the Blank Space16:11 New Calling as a Therapist18:26 Foundation and Book Giving19:11 Ovarian Cancer Progress20:04 How to Support Grievers22:14 Sudden vs Expected Loss25:02 End of Life Conversations30:47 Love and Grief Reflections31:41 Closing and Tech Reset Get full access to Elena Meets the Author at elenabowes.substack.com/subscribe
